Drink every time you feel too old watching the VMAS …
Am I too old for the VMAs? Sadly, I think the answer is yes, but I LIVE for an award show (even a stupid one like this) so I had to watch. I mean, my childhood is basically a VMA montage …
So let’s start counting the draaaaaanks:
I didn’t start out the show drinking because I DO know who Kendrick Lamar is and I love him. My husband recently bought his album and it has become our “dinner prep” go to music. I mean, you really get fired up to cook a meal when Kendrick is playing. I also thought his stage setup was LIT (ahhhh hahahahahaha ha ha ….ha whew).
Still no drink yet because Ed Sheeran was up next (who I LOVE!). I really liked seeing him with a band because if you’re an Ed fan, you know he usually plays solo. I also know “Shape of You” is super overplayed on the radio currently, but I really enjoyed hearing it played live.
Sooo some pierced up guy came out and all I was thinking was, “Who is this person with Ed??? Is Ed signing his song?” Confused.
Katy Perry came out next because she was hosting. I know KP and have even seen her in concert, so no drink here although I think I may have needed one because her jokes SUCKED! Anyone see Ellen’s face during Katy’s “jokes?” She wasn’t having it and neither was I!
Yay Fifth Harmony won an award! They cute; love them!
Hold. The. Phone! Up next was the entire reason I wanted to watch the VMAs in the first place, and I’m SO GLAD they put it toward the beginning of the show … THE NEW T SWIFT VIDEO! If you’re not a Swift fan, then scroll down a bit because I’m probs going to be spending a bit of time dissecting her video.
First off, she looked AMAZING! I love that she incorporated snakes (after being called one time & time again) and THE SNAKES THEN SERVED HER TEA!!!!???? I loved her choreography and the I Heart TS shirts (which you can purchase here!) the dancers wore! But, my favorite favorite part of the whole video was the end where she totally spoofed past “characters” of herself such as Surprised Taylor and I Want to Remove Myself from This Narrative Taylor.
I’ve gone back and forth on her message with the song and video. I really hope she’s not completely saying goodbye to her good girl image, but instead is telling the world these are the things you can make fun of me for, but guess what? I’m already aware of them so joke is on you.
SO many people weren’t here for the video or the song (except maybe, Spencer Pratt??). Many are saying that Taylor loves to make everyone aware of the fact that we should feel sorry for her or that everyone should feel the need to be Team Taylor. Maybe that is the case here. Or maybe she’s gone fully loco and has killed off her old self and is now just a crazy person.
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to think of feel!”
The last thing I will say regarding the video and song is go add Spencer Pratt on Snapchat. Just do it.
Before we get to Lorde, I want to mention that Shawn Mendes is the absolute CUTEST plus HAS REAL TALENT!! I want to go see him in concert.
Now Lorde …
I know who Lorde is, but I took a drink anyway at this point because her performance was so! weird! I know she apparently had the flu so maybe she couldn’t sing, buuuuuut what was the strange dance she did along with that outfit? My bestie even text me during it and said, “Okay is it just me or does this show get weirder and weirder every year?!?!?”
It’s not just you girl!
Guess what came next?!
Pete Wentz from Fall Out Boy came on with some girl I didn’t know but then figured out was the girl from that one Kanye video I can’t remember the name of & I can’t remember what her name was and why was she acting so strange??
Anyway, Fifth Harmony came back on at this point in the show to perform and again, I just freaking love them! Who caught the shaaaade thrown at Camila??
Miley Cyrus was up next and it was a veeeeery different VMA Miley than we’re used to. I thought she sounded amazing; I’m just not a fan of this new song of hers.
Who was the werido with Pete Davidson?
Wait, now who just introduced Demi?? Did she almost have a nip slip?? Is she drunk too??
Watched Demi; love her and love that song; I just thought the pool party scene was strange.
At this point in the show, I switched over to Game of Thrones (post coming soon; while you wait, recap here!). I heard Pink gave a great performance and speech, which I’ll probably go back and look up online. I think 30 Seconds to Mars performed, which I would have liked to see, if only for Jared Leto because I really only think of him from movies. Katy Perry performed, but seeing how the night had gone with her, I continued to care less. Oh, and they gave out some awards. Cool.
Depending on how you counted, I think that was between seven and nine drinks. Look, the Video Music Awards aren’t a bad show, but they just aren’t what they used to be. Everything seems like it has to be a spectacle or drama or top news story the next day, when maybe all I wanted was a great performance or two and musicians getting recognized for good music, I mean music videos ??
Wait, who even watches music videos anymore?!